If you are new here, you'll learn quickly that the Certains have a strong game face and highly dramatic life. We keep it cool here, most days. We also share here, because without you, we wouldn't be here. Community helped Jack find a kidney twice, so far. (age 2 and 13)
If you've been around the block with us awhile longer, you know we like to go at it alone sometimes, too often. We don't need any of your support because we have two 17 year old boys who know every thing about everything. We also have a soon to be 13 yr old lady who is on the accelerated emotional intelligence path. Thank God, Harry and I can finally take a rest.
You may recall my grammar is fair and if you are really keen you'll appreciate the bigger font. Don't expect a news feed with daily updates. For now, I simply intend to use this space to clarify, integrate, and to lead.
Be assured details will not be overshared here. Mad respect for the boundaries for this fine young man. I intend to engage with what is and help navigate the task of staying present.
Jack was diagnosed with PTLD Post-transplant lymphoproliferative disorder, a type of lymphoma, well known in the transplant world as a complication to avoid. He has a size-able mass in his abdomen that will need treatment. We also have a transplanted kidney to continue to protect. He will have 4 weeks of immunotherapy, evaluate, and continue another 4 weeks. He has a 75% chance of this treatment plan working. We will reroute to other less pleasant options at that time if he is not responding well. He will return to school, a nice change given he missed all of December.
The last several weeks have been difficult. The details don't really matter. You have your own version of a similar story. To witness one's suffering is harrowing, unthinkable. Little by little, we learn to stand tall and engage with what is. Choice. Choice with what is.
Our world came into focus so fast everything else outside got blurry. A weird gift that comes with a diagnosis and more waiting.
Jack got knocked down pretty hard, proving again to be the hardest working player in the room. Your composure, grit and bravery are undeniable. Your words, not mine "The comeback is gonna be huge". We are with you every step of the way.
To the people that experienced us in the raw the last two weeks, I am lucky to be known and loved so well.
Surrendering, softening is hard. We are programmed to close off and protect (each other, ourselves). We are also not blind to the grace that sweeps through at exactly the right time and cracks our heart and arms wide open.
It will take time to reset. Be assured we feel equipped, well loved, respected and supported. We are better at asking for help. We are better at surrendering when it is time. We are better at clarifying our needs. Oddly, we get better. We will use our voice for the good. For now, all healing hands and light on Jack.
